Steroids part 2

This will be in the same format as the first so read that disclaimer.

Basically Congress says they are doing this to clean up sports and help younger athletes stay away from steroids. We all know that the real reasons are publicity and wanting control of pro sports, but let's examine their reasons. First of all the cleaning up of sports, the rest of the article I'm going to focus only on steroids and focus on other drugs later in the blog or in another blog. It is almost impossible to completely clean up sports, it is almost admirable how far some athletes will go to win, putting themselves in personal danger from the side effects to be the best, but it is cheating. Baseball have taken great steps to clean up the sport, even though they have inadvertently singled out the wrong players (people on the border of minors and majors) instead of the Barry Bonds and Jason Giambis. Football has an alright drug policy but it seems to focus more on narcotics than steroids. NBA's drug policy is kind of a joke, but it works for the NBA because they recognize the culture of the game and players and steroids is not much of a worry. But the point is the leagues seem to have it under control. Like standardized testing in schools having standardized drug testing will hurt more than it will help. Baseball will be least effected and football would probably have a few more steroid catches but their stars would be safe, basketball has a lot of guys who smoke pot and a standardized policy would really hurt the league if stars get suspended for long lengths of time. Also they want to model the penalties after the olympics, so imagine in baseball if an Albert Pujols get suspended for two years because he did not check the label of a supplement or the Houston Rockets get stripped of a championship because McGrady smokes pot would be bad for everyone. For the part about helping the younger athletes this is my answer whenever someone tries to change something because a youngster imitates it, WHERE THE HELL ARE THE PARENTS. I understand parents cannot be watching their kids 24/7 and things like drinking will happen but if your kid becomes unbelievably jacked and has mood swings then shouldn't a flag go up. The high schools need to come up with better drug testing policies and the parents need to pay attention to their kids especially if they play football or baseball. Kids have killed themselves because of the mood swings associated with steroids, and these aren't single parent families where the parent works two jobs to support the family. These are middle class families where the parents (for the most part) are around and able to keep an eye on their kids. Maybe the government should be more concerned with setting up drug testing for pre-college athletes instead of professionals because that's where it starts.

More about steroids part 1

I apologize in advice I have a lot of feelings on the steroids issue along with other governmental issues and it will be written as I think so if some does not make sense thats why.

If you know me you know I have huge problems with the government and the president. It is almost as if every decision they make helps 2% of the country and hurts the other 98%. The current government has hurt the poor, minorities (both racial and sexual), and undid all the work the Clinton administration did for those groups and the economy as a whole. The current administration is against stem cell research (which is iffy but could save many lives), abortion (another touchy subject but why shouldn't a woman have the right to choose), gay marriage (if two people love each other why can't they marry?), and continue to try to implant Chrisianity into our lives whether we believe or not while making sure illegal Aliens can continue to stay in the country. Basically the Bush administration sees Christianity and Democracy as the only way of living and try to force those beliefs on the citizens and the rest of the world. They have engaged us in an unnecessary war costing us billions of dollars a month which has resulted in complete chaos in Iraq and the deaths of thousand innocent people and soldiers. You would thing Congress would be focusing on figuring out how to make the citizens of the country happy, or trying to figure out how to end the war as quickly and productively as possible. Well this is Bizzaro world and Congress is more concerned with steroids in sports than any of the pressing issues facing the country.

As we know baseball has been having a problem with steroids. Selig and the other heads of baseball supposedly didn't know that steroids were a problem, and increased the strictness of the policy. About 70 or so players have been caught so far (mostly Latin American or American), and many accused players have all of the sudden gotten smaller. Selig wants to make the policy even harsher, but that is for him and the players union to decide or so we thought. A couple years ago Bush mentioned how bad steroids is for baseball, which makes sense since he ran the Rangers into the ground like many of the other businesses he inherited and had a vested interest in baseball. But he did not say this during an interview he said it during the fucking State of the Union where he talks about what the most pressing issues are facing the country, he put steroids in professional sports in front of poverty and on par with the war. Now Congress is having hearings and want to take control of the testing policy for all four sports. Now let's go back and go over how the sports leagues works. Basically each league is a cartel of 30-some teams and through a collective bargaining agreement between the league and the union they are exempt basically from government interference and are allowed to govern themselves. But since Congress saw an opportunity once again to overstept their boundaries (i.e. Patriot Act the most intrusive act in American History) they decided to try to control the steroid/drug policy in all the leagues. This is a horrific idea, each league sees steriods as a different problem from a huge issue (MLB and to a lesser extent NFL who already has a solid policy) to a very minor issue (NBA). Each league is run through the CBA which was made as a compromise to try to please both the players and owners as much as possible. Adding a third party would complicate everything and open a can of worms giving Congress the opportunity to interfer with other parts of how the leagues are run. Hey Congress I got an idea GET YOUR FUCKING NOSE OUT OF THE BUSINESS OF THE LEAGUES AND FOCUS ON THE REAL ISSUES. During one of the interactions between the NBA and Congress one of the Representatives or Senators asked Billy Hunter (head of NBPA) about the weak testing policy and theres one thing they couldn't understand. The fact that steroids DON'T HELP NBA PLAYERS! They kept asking about it, if they don't understand the fact that the NBA steroid policy is weak because steroids slow the players down and being over-muscular does not help them in their careers. Basically the NBA drug policy tests if there is resonable doubt. Basically the NBA realizes that all the players smoke pot and random testing would come up with lots of positives for marijuana but not much else, so they use the resonable doubt excuse to avoid hurting the league with lots of pot suspensions. If Congress cannot understand why the NBA's policy then how can we expect a uniform policy for all leagues actually work. Congress went as far as to blame the brawl on steroids saying that the NBA should have tested because violent behavior is resonable doubt. There will be more on the issue in part 2.

NBA Playoffs

Since there is a day off and I'm bored I decided to make some playoff predictions and give out some Browshys (the awesomest award ever). So first the predictions:

Indiana vs. Detroit (Indiana 4-3)
I just can't help it I love Reggie, Jermaine, and Stephen so much I am on a first name basis with them. This team took the lopsided punishment by Stern and the loss of an all-star to come out the shadows sustain the team when all their stars were out and were left with six players, and fought for the sixth spot and had a first round upset of the over-seeded Celtics. Now they are facing the team that cost them a championship contension, don't you think they would love to knock off the Pistons. Do I think they are going to run out of gas, yeah probably but they have enough in the tank to take the series to seven games and to pull off the shocker in Detroit. Reggie will come up clutch as usual and Jermaine is finally getting his legs. The Pistons will continue their bitching and moaning about calls, but it won't matter. I will address some other Pacers later.

Phoenix vs. Dallas (Suns 4-3)
After Sunday's game all people can talk about is how the Mavs have the Suns figured out and how the series is over. That clearly is not the case, the Suns had to get over the loss of Joe Johnson and they weren't ready for the "Let Nash loose" strategy. But this does not spell the end of the Suns, it was not the strategy or Johnson that was the problem, it was the bad defense played by the Suns. As we all know the Suns are not defensive juggernauts, but in all their other games the Mavs shot under 45% and in the wins for the Suns the Mavs shot under 42% in both games. It is not an issue of the Suns keeping the score low, but they feed off the transition game so they need turnovers and rebounds to run. They will play better D and be better prepared for any Mavs strategy. The Mavs will get another win, but the Suns will win both at home.

Spurs vs. Sonics (Sonics 4-3)
Yes the third game to go seven games and this one is a pretty big upset since a lot of people have the Spurs winning the championship. The Sonics just keep getting role players to contribute at the right time. Without their all-star Lewis starters like Ridnour picked up his contribution and Damien Wilkins came out of nowhere to score 15 points, 5 steals, and 6 rebounds. Lewis should be back for game 5, and the Sonics have figured out to stop the Spurs you need to stop Parker and the supporting cast because Duncan is still a little slow and not the real Tim Duncan we are used to seeing. If the Sonics bench continues to at least stay with the Spurs bench, and the Sonics shoot like they did last game and earlier in the season the Sonics seem to want it more and will steal game seven and head to the Conference Finals. But there are a lot of 'ifs' and it is actually the Spurs series to lose, but they are not playing like they want it.

It is hard to read the playoffs especially with all three remaining series at 2-2, but anything can happen. Just as easily as the Pacers can surprise the world, the Pistons can end the cinderella story and give everyone the East Finals they have been looking forward to all year. It could also be an all-Texas West Finals instead of two teams SI had finishing outside the eighth seed. But I still think the Suns will meet the Heat in the finals like I have thought for a few months now.

Now for the Browshys:

MVP: Dwyane Wade (28.6 pts, 8.4 ast, 6.6 rbs) All they've needed is 8 games and they are in the Conference Finals. Shaq has been slowed with a thigh bruise so Wade has kicked it up, especially the last two games where the big man didn't play. I don't agree with Wilbon saying he is the best player under 6'10, but right now he is playing like the best player left in the playoffs.

Most underrated: Stephen Jackson (17.4 pts, 1.9 stls, 3.7 rbs) His numbers are down from his regular season numbers, but are still very good. His down stats are most likely a result of O'Neal playing again, but he still comes to play every night at both ends. But no one talks about him, hopefully someone sees how well he is playing.

Biggest Disappointment: Kenyon Martin (12.4 pts, 5.6 rbs, 1 blk) All his stats were down and he just didn't play well. His knee was hurt and he was playing against Duncan, but he just didn't breakout in any game.

Best Play: Tracy McGrady's dunk on Shawn Bradley. Good news Bradley is still alive, bad news he is still 7'6" and just got a major facial.

So thats it, the championship depends on the thigh of a giant. If he plays like Shaq the Heat will win, if not the Suns will backup their best record.

Thoughts for the day

Villanova girls are so much hotter than Penn girls. Since 'Nofun does not actually have restaurants or bars really close to campus, many of them take their BMWs and travel to the Mawr and utilize our facilities. They are more attractive but extremely annoying and stuck up, but you gotta take the good with the bad.

I went to Eckerds to get some things and I walk up to a register and the worker was sitting there eating cheetos. I put my stuff down and start taking my money out as she lets out a groan and stands up and starts checking me out. But she never takes her hand out of the cheetos bag. I'm sorry I interrupted your rest period by being a customer and making you do you job, but at least you didn't have to go too far out of your way by taking your hand out of the bag of cheetos. But maybe you should before you can't get up at all. I hate when people give me attitude when they have to do their job. I don't ask them to do anything extra like help me, I just want to be able to pay for what i want, but they still give me attitude. Well fuck you no wonder your working at eckerds if your too fucking lazy to stand up and push a button god knows you can't work in the real world. I'm lazy but when I have a job I never take out my frustration or sloth on the customers (unless they deserve it).

I hate the singer Ciara. She is not really hot, she can't sing, God knows she can't dance, so why is she famous. Her songs are unlistenable and theres a rumor she is a lesbian (which is cool) and a former hermaphrodite (not cool). Watch one of her videos all she does is try to be sexy (which just looks awkward) and grind for three minutes while her crappy song plays in the background. My recommendation to her is just to quit, not just music but life in general.

Jeremiah Trotter looks like a beefed up Charlie Murphy.

Eli Manning is extremely unathletic, just watch him on battle of the gridiron stars.

Commercials Review I

So as usual I'm watching television and this commercial comes on. This girl with braces is really excited about something, I assume she has herpes and is about to go rock climbing, but she is actually excited about her braces. Now I never had braces (not because I have perfect teeth because my overbite is so bad it would be useless) but everyone who I knew had them hated them. So I'm already pissed off and we are only six seconds into the commercial. Braces had just gotten her braces and the other girl we'll call her nobraces asks braces if they hurt and braces says no (which is a lie anyone who had just gotten braces will tell you they hurt like a bitch right after). Then nobraces tell her they look great and braces smiles and is proud of the recycled World War II bomber around her teeth. Then a guy she likes looks at her and goes "Braces?" and braces responds yes and he goes "Cool!" and the two girls giggle and the commercial tells the audience what the company is (some orthodonist company) and the commercial ends. Now first of all clearly they brought Shakespeare and Hemingway from the dead to write the dialogue, and secondly they decided to go for the emmy (or whatever crappy award they give for advertising) with the acting from the guy. Also the commercial is far from realistic, no boy would be impressed by braces and no girl would be that proud of her braces. So this commercial sucked at every level, plus the kids were under 16 so any thoughts I may have would be illegal so I didnt even have that going for me. Luckily it was a regional commercial so they get a pass at the crappiness.

The other commercial is a national commercial for Subway (from now on it will be referred to as crapway). Now I am spoiled with wawa so I hated crapway to begin with, but the "Jared" commercials send me over the edge. First of all I'm angry because every airport or anywhere I have to show my ID or when I introduce myself people go "Oh like from Subway you lost a lot of weight" as they chuckle at their stupid joke. Good one Richard Pryor haven't hear that one before. The Crapway Jared is some fat loser who had no friends and went to subway everyday should we really be celebrating him anyway. So Crapway Jared with his loser glasses, his loser shirt tucked into his loser pants, and his ugliness starts talking about how Crapway has doubled their menu (they did this by toasting sandwiches taking the exact idea that made quiznos unique, so the evil corporation crapway is, they decided to steal that idea and take business away from a company with a unique idea). And asks "Has McDonalds doubled their menu?" Of course not fuckface how would they do that toast their fries. This commercial is part of a new McDonalds bashing advertising campaign that tells us how much healthier Crapway is for us than McDonalds. First of all I'm sure it took the assbrains at Crapway ten years to discover what consumers knew for the last thirty. Second why attack McDonalds I understand that you are both fighting over the fast food market but they serve two completely different purposes. If you feel like a sandwich you will go to wawa (or crapway if you are from somewhere that sucks, except Jersey has wawa even with their reputation for sucking) and if you feel like a hamburger you go to another place. It would be like Olive Garden trash talking Outback or Pepsi bashing a juice company it just shows how dumb these companies are. Crapway also has a new sandwich that is a hamburger on a sub roll, which I just feel is hypocritical and a concession that they can't actually compete with fast food places. So this is Crapway's reputation, they bash companies unprovoked and stupidly too since they serve completely different food, they have some social reject sponsoring their restaurant, and they steal ideas from other companies. Crapway is clearly evil and should be boycotted.

The Marquette Gold....seriously?

Marquette University was in discussion of what their athletics name should be. They changed their name to the Golden Eagles in 1994. Before that they were the Warriors, they originally changed their name because of pressure from Native Americans. I personally like the Golden Eagles name, there is a certain prestige and pride that comes with an eagle and the golden is in there so they could keep their original colors. Well Marquette completely disagrees with me and felt the name was boring, so they decided to change it. There was pressure from alumni to change it back to the Warriors and a bunch of alumni offered a million each to change it back, but the president quickly rejected the offer. The Marquette community lacked excitement to keep the Golden Eagles so that went out. So clearly they called Syracuse University and asked what they should do, and Syracuse said "Hey why have a real mascot you can cheer for, just make it a color." So thats what they did and they will forever be known as the Marquette Gold. Maybe it's just me but NAMING A TEAM AFTER A COLOR IS THE DUMBEST PRACTICE EVER. Seriously how can someone be proud of just a color, I need a mascot to cheer for. "But Jared," some moron will ask me "what about the Cincinnati Reds and the Cleveland Browns Wll first of all the Reds are 121 years old and the Browns 60 years old so that alone should be reason enough, but for the slower people in class the Reds used to be the Red stockings and they shortened the name. The Browns had a contest to see what they should name the team and many of the submissions had Browns in honor of extremely popular coach Paul Brown. So both had a reason and they are a combined 181 years old. So lets stop being dumb and put a stop to having colors as the team representative. I'd rather have a stapler as the representative then be the Penn Maroons.

Thank you Sixers

I just wanted to take a break from studying to thank the Sixers for a great season. It cannot be measured in win or losses or playoff success but it was most exciting season since 2001. Iverson had the best season of his career, and again silenced the critics who said he could not play point. His heart and desire is something not only every athlete should take note of, but also society in general, but I will devote an entire blog to Iverson later. For the first time in a long time we have a future, players like Dalembert (we are supposed to resign him) and Iguodala will make this team exciting for years. Iguodala has superstar written all over him and when his shooting catches up with the rest of his game he will be amazing. Unfortunately we have a crappy GM so we have no first round picks this year, and we have to deal with Webber's contract of death for the next few seasons but I will look foward to next season. Thank you Sixers for all the joy and entertainment you brought me.

More NBA plus Brady sucks

I just wanted to talk about two off the court situations from the playoffs. First of all the Jason Williams and reporter incident. Jason Williams may or may not have said those things but if he did it sounds like it was taken out of context. If I was playing in the NBA and someone asked me about my life I would have said something similar about how my family is the most important part of my life. The reporter probably asked one thing and took the quote to make it sound like something else. I may not agree with how Jason Williams dealt with it, but I am sure Williams does not overreact every single time someone writes something bad about him so clearly the reporter took liberties with the article. Plus he just got swept so that probably added to everything.

Ray Allen said that USA basketball players should be paid. HEY RAY YOU MAKE EIGHT FIGURES HOW ABOUT YOU GET PAID FOR SLEEPING TOO. The United States has given these men the opportunity to make insane amounts of money along with all the freedom given to them by the country (we could get into race and how much freedom we actually get but thats a different issue). They are asked to represent their country over the summer and make the other 280 million people proud to be American. Instead they whine about getting time off and resting. Iverson may not fit the image America wants, but he wanted to play very badly and he played extremely well with the second tier players who he never played with before. Even after being passed over multiple times he still wanted to play for free. How about players stop trying to find ways to squeeze more money out of basketball and do something for the good of their country. Players should be falling over themselves to prove how good United States basketball is.

Can someone in the media get off Tom Brady's balls for like three minutes. Fine he is a good quarterback, but not a great one. He has probably earned a Hall-of-Fame induction with three super bowls, and all the blowjobs he has given but how many times has he carried the team like a McNabb or a Vick has. I am just tired of the Boston/New York favoring and I would love to see one sportscenter that does not start with "A-Rod has splinter may need Band-Aid, and next a history of Band-Aid use by the Yankees throughout their history" or "Boston fan [insert stupid action here]" or "Boston needs more championships, heres 45 minutes on Boston but nothing on their racism" It is sad that I get excited when more than thirty seconds is spent on a Philadelphia team (which only happens if it is football season or someone made up something about Iverson), meanwhile I estimate at least ten minutes a night on the Red Sox and Yankees during baseball season and seven minutes a night during offseason in addition to everything done on the Patriots. That is a joke and I hope ESPN realizes there are people outside New England and New York before they alienate most of their fans. Plus Stewart Scott sucks and should be fired for being the biggest tool ever.

Ramblings

Made is the most awkward show to watch ever. I mean who wants to see a five foot science club nerd trying out for the basketball team and fail at everything his teacher tries to teach him/her until somehow they make the team.

The best part of those biography shows on E! or VH1 is the action shot of the person being interviewed walking down the hall in their office. But they only do that if the person is not famous.

Speaking of which True Hollywood Story they interviewed someone from a Minnesota newspaper and the woman was typing on a computer for her action shot. The computer, however, had a green screen. Now maybe it's just me but shouldn't they at least have color screens for computers at a major newspaper. Then again it is Minnesota.

I cannot remember being as disappointed in the outcome of a game as I was at the Sixers vs. Pistons game on Sunday. Not only were we not making layups and free throws, but we were not getting any calls at all. Clearly the NBA fixes series like the NCAA fixes the tournament.

Iverson is clearly the MVP. I know how good Shaq is and I know his departure from LA and arrival to Miami caused a swing of like 37 games, but tell me how good the Sixers would be without Iverson. He had his best season statistically and led a very mediocre team into the playoffs and almost pulled to 2-2 with the world champions. Watch him play one game and tell me who the MVP is.

Other playoff observations; The Sonics look really good and I would kill for a Sonic/Sun Western Conference Final and I really think the Suns could win it all, but I need to see the Heat to beat a real team first. Tim Duncan looks to be in pretty bad shape. And if the Pistons are able to hold off the Sixers I would love a Pistons Pacers series which should of happened in the first round, but the NBA did not want that to happen and fixed the last quarter of the Pacers game.

Why are people celebrating Vince Carter, he admitted he did not try his hardest in Toronto and he whined until he got his way and then decides to play well. Thats like a CEO losing millions of dollars for a company for 3 years and then when he turns a profit one quarter they throw a parade. Carter is trash and he is everything that is wrong with the way the NBA plays basketball, and I think he should be suspended for a year for being the piece of trash he is.

Why isn't Saved by the Bell on TBS other than ridiculously early in the morning. Maybe they could replace one of the 450 episodes of Everybody Loves Raymond with SBTB. I also have yet to meet anyone who watches that show anyway.

Boston Sucks.

Lastly I am tired of the assholes here not thanking me for holding a door open or closing the door in my face. You may have better grades or be richer than me, but we'll see how many doors you close in my face when I stick your trendy iPod up your ass.